Solemn Night
by Steras
Summary: Gumshoe does a lot of thinking before he goes to sleep.


8D I felt like writing a serious crack, and this is what I came up with. I've been really wanting to play the other Phoenix Wright games, but I only have the first one, sadly. But, as I was replaying Turnabout Goodbyes, I felt that Gumshoe's high opinion of Edgeworth equated to him secretly obsessed with him. Plus, it's been a while since I've posted anything on . Oh, me and my laziness.

**Pairing: ****onesided**** GumshoeEdgeworth  
****Disclaimer: **So, just so you know, I don't own any of the rights to the Ace Attorney games or the characters. I just twist them around for my own pleasure.

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**S **_**o l e m n **_**N **_**i g h t**_

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Dick Gumshoe probably won't ever be considered a deep thinker by a normal person, but does that really change the fact that he is one? Does it erase the fact that every night, long past the bedtimes of many, he is propped up against his headboard and pillow, deep in thought?

He thinks about a lot of things, a lot of people, but mostly one thing. Or, rather, one person. Gumshoe gazes off into the darkness of his pitch black room, and if someone poured light into the room, they would see. They would see the shame in his eyes that was never stagnant in order to keep it hidden. Sometimes a person would see it for a moment, and they would have glance back again, but by the time it registered in their brain, it was already long gone. It was buried under the facade of happiness.

This is good, according to Gumshoe. In his mind, it's what's right.

He is starving for (and starved of) Miles Edgeworth. The Miles Edgeworth who is a full six years younger than him. The Miles Edgeworth who is a grumpy prosecuting attorney.

Yeah. That one.

Gumshoe can't help it. Edgeworth is not like anyone he's ever met. He makes Gumshoe's daily life so much better. He loves the intense gazes that he was given when he provided evidence. He loves the clipped speech and the way he carries himself. He loves the fact that he had a troubled past and has found a way to move forward. He loves the antisocial personality. He loves his flaws. He loves it all. He is just so goddamn wonderful.

But, no one would have ever suspected Gumshoe to have feelings for a man, let alone Edgeworth.

Gumshoe doesn't only think of Edgeworth's personality. No, that would be too innocent. He thinks of his body, too. He likes to picture just what Edgeworth might look like underneath all the layers of clothing. He also imagines how his body could respond to the detective's hands. It wasn't always so sexual either. It was harmless at first. A brush against a cheek, a peck on the lips. But everyone gets bored of the same thing once in a while, right? Gumshoe is no exception.

And when Gumshoe is lost in a moment of fictional ecstasy, he sometimes sees his mother's face. In that split second, all pleasure vanishes. These are the times he is overcome with such guilt that he thinks his heart will rip and tear apart.

He can see it. He can see it all. He would go over to the small house he grew up on and knock on the oak door, and would be let in by his confused-by-the-sudden-visit-but-happy-none-the-less mother. She would give him some tea and he would sip it. Green tea. She knew him well. As the reunion went on, her previous feelings would be replaced with concern. She would question him and demand answers, but he would remain silent until he couldn't contain himself and the words he never wanted to say would slip out.

"_I'm in love."_

Or lust.

And for just one moment, she would swell with such pride that only a mother can have until she realized that a person in love was not like this. She would look him in the face, and his eyes would convey one word to her. Gay. She wouldn't understand at first, but when she did, it would hurt. Her only son, her only child, gay. Gumshoe would see her fantasy of a faceless daughter-in-law and faceless grandchildren crumble as she realized that was all it was. A fantasy, a joke. A lie.

She would think back to when her Dicky Ducky was a teenager and how she was so thankful that he wasn't sleeping with girls and getting them pregnant, and how she didn't have to wonder if he was doing the right thing. She didn't need to worry like other parents probably did, but looking back, maybe she should have. Not about about him not having sex or not dating. About him showing no interest in girls at all.

He would be there to watch her heart break, unable to do anything.

Gumshoe could count the all the girls he's been with on one hand, even if that hand was missing a finger or two. He didn't really understand what the fuss was about and all his guy friends liked them so much. He wasn't a virgin though; that was taken care of years ago with his second girlfriend. It was awkward and strange. He didn't care for it. One might have assumed that was a big flashing sign that was all rainbows, but maybe he was just colorblind.

His thoughts then drift back to memories Edgeworth in attempts to cheer himself up. He remembers the first time he met the man. He was a lot younger back then, but besides a few tweaks in his wardrobe, he appeared the same. He remembers Edgeworth's detached politeness and how he slowly warmed up. He remembers hearing, "Dick, do you have the autopsy report?" for the first time and remembers that that simple, insignificant sentence is what started it all. For some reason that Gumshoe cannot explain, when his name was spoken by the prosecutor, it ignited a fire within him that still burns to this day.

Gumshoe also remembers that the person he obsesses over has changed. Little by little, piece by piece, he evolved into a better man. As much as Gumshoe would love to say that he made Edgeworth into a better person, he's not in denial. He saw what really changed was his personality. He knows very well who affected the prosecutor so deeply. Phoenix Wright. And as much as he wants to hate the defense attorney for doing what he couldn't do, he can't, because for some strange reason, Edgeworth likes him. But that doesn't stop him from feeling jealous; he knows that if Miles is going to pursue a relationship with a man, it won't be him. It will be Mr. Wright. Wright's special. Gumshoe isn't. Anyone with eyes can see that.

Gumshoe wants to know what Edgeworth sees in Wright. He wants to correct the problem so Edgeworth will want him instead.

_Is there something wrong with my body? With my mind? What is it? _And as much as Gumshoe wants to ask Edgeworth for the answer himself, he knows he can't.

Then after a few hours, Gumshoe decides that he can't think anymore and pulls the covers over his head. There's overwhelming pain flowing alongside his blood, but he can't provide himself a remedy for his it. He can't do anything, and that, in turn, is more painful.

Much more painful.

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End file.
